Tuesday, November 13, 2007

dejavu feeling cause unfair judgement

i met up with my college friends yesterday night. as usual they will go to this topic.

friend: are you still single?
cy: yup. erm... i was attached once after college if your still means since college days. hahaha
friend: surely got ppl going after you right since you are so hot? too caught up with work is it.
cy: nooo... i have social life ok. (yahh got ppl going after, but they are all of weird cases for eg...)

i remembered when i first saw him i felt that like he looks like my 3rd ex bf. i did wonder if it is because he stared at me like he used too. the kind that keep glaring at you even when you look at him.

i kind of know it when he makes small talk unlike how other guys without motive do so. offering to drive me back eventhough i drove was quite funny. offering to fetch me back to work the next day to get my car would be giving him too many opportunities. though i was totally tempted to do so since i was dead tired doing OT that period and driving was definitely the last thing i want to do.

i never put much thought to it after my freelance job with that company was over. till i bummed into this guy a few months later right outside my gym where he got my contact in the name of "pass me your contact, i can pass you some freelance job if my friend ask for a writer". i laughed and answered him "im not a writer, im a designer". so he turned the story around and said he can passed me design job then.

i did not of course receive any jobs from him except for many invites to join him for gym and lunch. which i did not purposely avoid but our timing wasn't good so we never actually once met.

i couldnt believe why i bum into him every time i step into that office. whether it is me reversing my car or walking up the stairs. he must be somewhere around and following that will trigger him to SMS me again.

mostly, i never understand why he knows that i know he is attached (because his colleague loudly warned him not to flirt), yet still he thinks that he can get around me.

i dont feel anything at all to him, but that was exactly how i felt for my ex too. he had proven he doesnt has the killer sweet lips which won my heart over like my ex since he is quite bad in even making a date happen, so i guess he will not do me any harm. because i was just wondering if i should be friends with him since im suspicious of his motive. but i shall give him the benefit of doubt maybe he was just being friendly. i definitely do not look like the kind of girl that can be your FWB (Friend With Benefit) despite knowing you has a gf, right? or i can just pretend to be busy the next time he calls since i have always been busy.

i hate dejavu feeling because it warns your heart to be cautious of ppl that has similar trade. and sometimes it is pretty unfair for eg they look alike. but sometimes you really can't help it.

experiences in your life does make you whether you like it or not.

No comments: