Wednesday, August 30, 2006

i had been thinking of you

it had been a busy week, juggling between the conference and work. i do not really have the time to check any blog. all the time that was left i used it to sleep. but that had not keep me from reflecting on my life and journalling. i have not stop thinking, i guess i just can't stop. why do ppl do this or why not?

this is one set of my many thought: i wonder how many times do ppl visit my blog in a day? what do they do when they keep visiting and find out that i have not update my blog. will they give up checking? will they reason that my life had been uneventful? will they call to find out how i am doing? or at least sms me? why do they not want me to know they visit my blog? what if i have a way of finding out, will they still visit my blog? why do ppl who doesn't know me read my blog? why kind of person do they think i am? do my thoughts inspire ppl at all?

i know i had said this before but i am really curious? is my blog just a reading material or you read because you want to know how i am doing? i dare say if you do read my blog you will really know how i am doing because i am not a blogger that blogs my routine but more like the condition of my heart. therefore my entries can be contradictory at times because that could be just how i felt that day.

some of my entries might sound pretty depressing but i was just trying to be honest with how i feel. and yes i am a very emotional person. i know not everyone know how to react to that but bare with me i am trying to be truthful to how i feel.

what about the conference? i will blog about it later. ps nick told me to keep a journal for 21 days and ask God to give me direction. i am not sure why that magic number. keep your eyes on this page especially those of you that are struggling from quater-life crisis because i asked him this question: "how do you know that you are stagnant (stuck) or it is just a waiting process (ministry of darkness-when God seems silence though present)?" the million-dollar-question, he gave me a fairly good answer. i am processing myself now.


Sam said...


deJelly said...

A note.

Edmund said...

er....urm....perhaps to improve your page rating I refresh it like 10000 times using an auto-mouse clicker to help get your counter up. Just kidding. It could be a lot of reasons. I can't speak for the stalkers or those that just simply click on your page when it shows up on the ticker on homepage as soon as you update your blog. No matter the reason, I will have to say, your blogs are always very very intriguing stuff. I love it.

Jon Ng said...

yap......check ;)

chaiyen said...

yes the few that read my blog :)

Anonymous said...

We read your blog. Still waiting to hear from you about the conference since you sms me to pray for you =)

Pauleon said...

i also got read ok. but i use bloglines so i don't need to keep coming back and check whether people update.

yalor... hehehe.

and i read to just know what's going on in your life lor. same goes for other ppl's blogs. hehh.

erm.. sometimes lag behind la. esp. when internship takes away my life. =(