Tuesday, August 28, 2007

people before papers

why i tend to be overpassionate over what i care about. when i so often forget how to rest...

i think im always busy. and it all depends on what im passionate about in that season. work, ministry, friends, bf...

i only realised that when my phone start ringing again. there were a season of time when my phone never really ring except for calls from my bf. yes pathetic, i never believe in relationship on top of friends. but somehow i dont know where everyone else was.

but the thing is, if to meet ppl once a day should be the norm. then im abnormal. cause in average now i meet at least one friend a day. yes i said at least, if not 2-3. so much so dinesh ask me "why do you have so many yam cha sessions? you are a yam cha queen" i go for birthdays, lunch, dinner, farewell, new born, movies. on top of that, i cannot help but be there for the broken hearted -- break up, agonising complicated relationship victim and got rejected fella.

so i work really late, woken up by a call that rush me into the office. sometimes from one client office to the other. from morning till the sun goes down. i could barely keep both my eyes open. then my phone ring. yam cha? at the sound of the voice, my heart melts. so off for one session. before my foot could barely step into the house, my phone ring again. a little update of the horrible situation he is going through... awww better company this person, if not sitting alone at home will kill him. before i know it, it is 2am. take my shower, sit in front of the laptop. then i go through the list of my things-to-do. which is urgent? everything is. pray a short prayer to do the impossible –- to stay awake. and then the cycle repeats itself.

i am not complaining about ppl calling me. im really enjoying it. though sometimes i think im quite crazy to still go out after work. but im glad i did. people before papers. definitely.

everything i wanted i took – i never said no to myself. i gave in to every impulse, held back nothing. i sucked the marrow of pleasure out of every task my reward to myself for a hard day's work! then i took a good look at everything i'd done. looked at all the sweat and hard work. but when i looked, i saw nothing but smoke. smoke and spitting into the wind. there was nothing to any of it. nothing. solomon, ecclesiastes my favourite book from the bible

if im just enjoying work, it is meaningless. therefore i need to spent time with living souls. i have no regrets even though i do not have enough sleep. i only pray that God will see my sweet heart and spare me from having wrinkles. having said that im enjoying my work too.


Sam said...

'there were a season of time when my phone never really ring except for calls from my bf. but somehow i dont know where everyone else was.'

Happens when you're with someone who doesn't enlarge your world.


Enjoy the calls! They are inspired by you.


chaiyen said...