Monday, April 14, 2008

is marriage about taking chances?


she is finally engaged and getting married this year. after breaking up for the... let me see more than both my hands add up together. this pair of high school sweetheart is finally getting married. oh yah and i meant if each finger represents 10. so yup, they had broke up for like hundred over times. at the rate they went you just never thought they will make it. but when i saw them last year at another friend's wedding i think they had both grown. i assume they dont fight and break up like they used to. i think i saw this mutual understanding that they are sure now.

do you think it takes a 100 times for that girl to be confident that he is really in for it. not that we are proud of it but a girl always needs the assurance that the guy is still interested in them no matter how old there are. im not saying she did that for fun, i sincerely believe she doubted that it will work.

im dumbstruck though by what makes the guy stay that long. though most guy will at least not give up on you the first time as an answer to themselves that they are certain and an assurance to you. the second times you know are already pretty challenging. can you imagine by the 10th times? and come on the 67th times? the 98th times? after which break up do you actually decide to marry her? im all curious and work out by this phenomena. what makes him so sure that it is time?

"Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall i forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."

sorry, im definitely using that out of context. but yah sometimes 7 times to us seems a lot to us but is it possible it is really not about the numbers. maybe 50 first dates will give us a good idea. perhaps it is not about how many times or how it can work out anymore. anyway you can never be certain that your spouse will never change, so your best bet is that you know your feelings for this person will never change.

could it be he just come to the realisation that she is just it and he will never quit pursuing her? for a moment i think that is the million dollar answer to that question to "whom shall i marry?". we need to stop asking who will commit to me but ask who will i commit myself to for the rest of my life. having said this, im assuming you are not looking for an ideal marriage but building an ideal marriage with someone that matters to you.

anyway im happy for them that they finally make it. at this stage im pretty sure there are both highly convince that there are no other they want to marry. life is about taking chances.

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